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Lesson 4: Improvise (Be Humble)

By on Jan 18, 2015 in Improvise (Be Humble), Lessons | 0 comments

Humility comes in many forms and flavors. Sometimes, it comes in the form of a charismatic Fortune 500 businessman eating a hard-boiled egg with a spoon.   John Carrington* met me at a small Manhattan café to discuss business, or at least so I thought. After a storied career in finance, a 55-year marriage and a meteoric ascension from small beginnings in Astoria to international corporate fame, he was now the Chairman of numerous high-profile boards with generous budgets and global reach. He had what’s called “wasta” in Arabic: influence, clout, pull, power, swag with a capital “S.” He was the kind of guy who walked into a room and pulled the room’s energy his way. First, he was 6’4” with military posture and big mits. A handshake from John typically involved him leaning down, smiling, and offering the recipient a somewhat inflated version of 5 fingers and a soft palm (his mits, in part, made him a high school basketball standout). Second, his intense sky-blue eyes twinkled when he smiled (nothing to do with cataract surgery, mind you) and locked on their target like lasers. If you weren’t careful, and didn’t peer past his stylish spectacles (or better yet, catch him in profile view), you might miss the fact that John was actually studying whatever he was looking at; his gaze, unwavering and his silent analysis, comprehensive. Third, he smiled and/or chuckled almost continuously. Continuously!   ‘But,’ I thought… ‘Rich people laugh all the time.’ My litmus test for why they are laughing is whether or not the smile includes or does not include the eyes (eyes included = safe; eyes not included = disconcerting). At times it seems condescending/bullying (“I could buy you, everything in this room, this building and even this block…! This amuses me…! Mmwahahahaha…!”), at others, nervous (“OMG, what if I’m not as perfect as my hair/nails/jewels/suits/shoes/cars/houses suggest – and worse, people find out?!?! Ha. Ha. Ha?”), and at others, social but false (“I’m pretty sure I’m supposed to laugh along with everyone now so I’m, um, laughing… chuckle, chuckle… And throwing my head back for effect… chuckle, chuckle…”). But John’s laugh started and ended with his eyes. It was as though joy – the unshakable kind, had taken up residence in his face and the laugh lines flanking his intense blue eyes were it’s badges of honor.   We sat down to talk about a business proposition. So naturally, after “hello, it’s great to see you John, oh, and thank you for coming on a Tuesday…” I hastily opened my laptop and offered to show him my presentation. He stopped me. No. He was sure it was excellent. But he’d rather we just get to know each other. I blinked rapidly (confused, mildly flustered), cleared my throat (composing myself), swallowed (submitting to the request), sat back in my chair and put my laptop away (proposition accepted). Ok. We’d “get to know each other.” Hm… This might be nice.   He opened with how he met his wife (in high school, on a subway car, and the rest was a beautiful 55-year history), he remembered the searing pain of having lost an adult child to a rare disease (tears still well up), he confided that when he met me, something about me made him think we shared the same faith (we did), and he described the various charitable boards he chairs. And so it went. We talked not about what we would do but who we were and how we’d become that way – our life journeys. I used my ears and eyes in the proportion they were given me (listened > spoke) and all the while, I knew I wanted to be around this giving spirit, this battle-tested (and scarred) vessel of gratitude for as long as I could – that day and long into the future.       Then our food came. He ordered a hard-boiled egg and oatmeal, I opted for Nutella hot chocolate and a sandwich. He was in the middle of telling me his keys to success…       Respect everyone (title or no title) Integrity at all costs People respond to your energy, not your accolades Take risks   …when suddenly, he realized he had no knife. The server had given him a spoon (for the oatmeal) but no knife (for the egg). I frequented this little café almost daily for the better part of a year so I was used to hiccups (no fork, no napkin, no sugar, no pepper) so I said I knew where to grab a knife. I started to get up. He immediately chuckled and gestured for me to sit down, “oh, no, no, no,” he said, grabbing the spoon, “I’ll improvise,” and he hurriedly went back to his sermon…   Answer directly to the boss Help as many people as you can Build a home to “come home” to   And so it went. He preached about life and success, his journey and lessons learned while cracking the egg-shell with the back of his spoon, “cutting” it up with the front and eating his oatmeal with the same spoon. All in one fell swoop. I smiled. Improvise.     In that moment, he taught me much more than how to creatively eat an egg when the implements you are used to are not available. His reaction in that moment spoke volumes about who...

Lesson 3: Enlist A Sidekick

By on Jan 14, 2015 in Enlist A Sidekick, Lessons | 1 comment

Batman had Robin, the Lone Ranger had Tonto, Frodo had Samwise, Shrek had Donkey, Sonic had Tails and of course, Don Quixote de la Mancha had Sancho Panza! Me? I have Miss Nina Simone, my 5-year-old Shih Tzu, a prodigy of a sidekick! The mighty Miss Nina is a veritable Afropolitan: she was born in Accra, Ghana, and in her short tenure as my sidekick, Nina has re-located (albeit involuntarily), to Baltimore, Manhattan and Boston; she’s traveled to 8 states and often returns to Ghana. As William Shakespeare wrote, “though she be but little, she is fierce!” Miss Nina Simone is arguably the greatest sidekick of all time (sorry, Sancho). In the art of flight and life, a sidekick-cum-co-pilot is necessary for a number of reasons (to be explored in a subsequent post), but let’s first outline a few salient characteristics an excellent sidekick should have.       1. It helps if they are furry and cute. Chewbacca is a good example. So is Miles “Tails” Prower, Sonic’s sidekick extraordinaire. Furry and cute things with 2 to 4 legs generally make us smile and coo uncontrollably, even in the middle of a grueling track workout or lifting session (exhibit number one: picture of Nina in the weight room, into which I have smuggled her on more than 1, 2, 3, or maybe 12 occasions).     2.  They should be of a cool and calm demeanor. Piglet and Pooh are a good example here. Piglet, though he is generally considered Pooh’s sidekick, once had this exchange with Pooh: “Pooh?” Piglet said. “Yes, Piglet?” Pooh replied. “Oh, nothing, I just wanted to be sure of you.” So cute! The key to a good sidekick is their calm and steady presence in your life. Just there. Being calm and steady. And bringing a great deal of comfort to an occasionally topsy-turvy existence.   3. Bonus points if they have a super power or at the very least a fascinating idiosyncrasy that makes you laugh. Nina, for example, despite her minuscule size, can inexplicably imitate every athletic feat I attempt on the track. When I first started bringing her to the track, she was just a baby (1 year). I brought her so I wouldn’t have to leave her at home since she still wasn’t house trained. I assumed she’d want to hang out by the pit as I ran around but she would bark and cry so I let her off the leash. You’d never believe it but she would run, in her own lane for distances up to 120 meters with me… And she would jump, into the long jump pit, after me! I didn’t believe it myself until a woman at the track asked how I’d trained my dog to be a track athlete. I laughed and explained that I hadn’t trained her… That she must be mistaken… But the woman insisted that Nina was  doing the workouts. So I asked her to videotape it.   Nina and I jumping:   http://www.theartofflight.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/01/Nina-Yetsas-Long-Jump-Practice.mp4   The idea of my tiny Shih Tzu taking off at the edge of the runway and jumping into the long jump pit is endlessly delightful and never fails to make me smile. What an amazing sidekick!     4. They should embody love, an endless amount of it, as well as a dash of unwavering commitment. Luckily, Nina is a natural pack animal (as are we) so this trait is embedded in her DNA. I’ll let a few pictures take us out…       Share this:EmailFacebookLinkedInLike this:Like...

Lesson 2: Fly High The Banner Of Inclusion

By on Jan 11, 2015 in Expand Your Team, Lessons | 0 comments

“Sport has the power to change the world… It has the power to unite people in a way that little else does… It is more powerful than governments in breaking down racial barriers. It laughs in the face of all types of discrimination…” – Nelson Mandela, Laureus World Sports Awards, Monaco 2000. Operative words:   Change. Power. Unite.    The fact is this: 9/10 times I watch an individual athlete prepare for a match, a trial, a race or a round, something happens. A flame, small but steady, is quietly ignited in me, glowing ever brighter as the athlete gears up to compete. I almost feel like I’m there with them, rehearsing mental cues, exhaling slowly, shaking out some tightness somewhere, anywhere, everywhere (!). I suspect a similar flame is ignited in every athlete in every nation who knows what that anticipation feels like. Infinitesimal, it is immovable. Hidden, it holds its bearer silently rapt, watching with intensity, willing the athlete – her muse in that moment – to achieve excellence for the sake of excellence itself. It is a light that transcends space, time, language, race, wealth and pedigree to encircle like a purse string, to illuminate like a constellation – a common light shining brightly in uncommon people. Even in girls. Even in persons with disabilities. Even in whomever you think of as “them” or “other” or “different.”   Them, they… The other… Their breath is just as much a gift as yours. Their heart beats with the same life-sustaining vigor (and wonder) as yours. They are, therefore you are. Sport forces you to recognize this, especially when you’re wearing the same jersey as your “other,” “them,” or “they.” As Nelson Mandela described, sport laughs in the face of discrimination, creates hope, inspires and unites with unforced ease. It is one of the world’s most powerful tools of social inclusion.   It’s hard to remember exactly when I made the shift from “them” to “us,” but during the 10th annual All-Africa Games, para-athletes (my original “them”) and able-bodied athletes (my original “us”) wore the same yellow jersey on totally different terms. Reflecting their deep-seated and perhaps unconscious disdain for persons with disabilities, Team Ghana paid for a single square room for all of our male para-athletes and a second square room for all of our female para-competitors. In contrast, able-bodied athletes like me (“us,” in my head, at the time) shared a room with only two teammates!     The sight of my para teammates crammed onto a string of undressed, adjoining mattresses covering the rooms’ floors with weathered wheelchairs  piled into narrow kitchens like surplus storage, reminded me of the phrase “three-fifths of a human.” It shook me. And it stood in stark contrast to what I saw outside those stuffy quarters.     On the streets of the 10-block Village, we trained. It was best to train first thing in the morning before full light (and heat) and let me tell you, I loved those mornings. Listening to the rhythmic songs of Team Kenya, their perfect harmonies dancing blithely around the beat of their synchronized footfalls, made my heart swell with pride for being African. Who doesn’t run well to a good beat and perfect harmonies? All this time, I thought it was just genetics!   An acapella warm up: http://www.theartofflight.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/01/Acapella-Warm-Up.mp4   Watching my para teammates practice turned my definition of sport on its head: graceful, artful, seemingly unstoppable, impossibly perfect vessels of speed, they flew down the streets of the Village during practice runs. They looked like human bullets (!), embodiments of light or better, electricity, their bodies seemed so perfectly in tune with racing chairs, crouched, heads cocked, like Africa’s big cats on the hunt at dawn. The swishhhhhhhhhhh of their wheels was made more captivating by the Doppler effect and consistently compelled my head to turn and follow their trails, half-way losing track of whatever 20-meter drill I was doing. I couldn’t concentrate. So impressed, so taken was I by the beauty and sheer power of it all, I imagined they moved the ground beneath them, beneath me, beneath us (ah, maybe that’s where the “us” started…). And I couldn’t help but wonder why on earth I hadn’t seen or been shown this brand of athleticism before. Why hadn’t this obvious display of strength, power, grit, grace been depicted in billboards, coffee table books, magazines and films? And why hadn’t I seen, known or articulated what I recognized then: that sport is, in the end, perhaps the strongest tool we’ve got for inclusion. Because at the end of the day, when you share a jersey and a journey, mutual respect inevitably builds. How could it not? You know what it’s taken for you to get to a certain point/place/event. Your sport forces you to the extreme of (pick a noun, any noun)…   To me, there is no purer expression of the above than through sport. And the most amazing part is… Sport is available to us all (similar to some but distinct from other forms of creative self-expression). Sport at any level, from recreational to elite, requires only the ability to move…something. One, two, three, four or five legs… Five, four, three, two or one arm… As long as there is a physical component to your existence, the opportunity to move is inherently available to you. And you can be completely human (read: complex!) in that space. You can for example be tenacious and doubtful at the same time, be...

The Art* Of Flight

By on Jan 5, 2015 in Welcome | 0 comments

Ever notice how much you can learn about life through art and sports? My sport is the long jump. Scratch that. The long flight. I’ve learned more through sports than I have through anything else so I decided to write about it! This blog is a series of adventures and ‘aha’ moments aimed at anyone who believes in the power of sport to teach life lessons, who pursues excellence of mind, body and spirit equally, and is interested in living skillfully, artfully and brilliantly!   I’ve been running and jumping since I was 11 but put track & field on hold at various points in my life: medical school was accompanied by time constraints and stress; the first part of residency brought a knee injury; and fellowship found me with a deep and sincere desire to become expert at interventional spine and sports medicine. I am also a spine and sports medicine doctor. People often wonder aloud how those two things go together (with an attendant facial expression that reads, “either you’re lying or you’re crazy.”). But how could they not go together? First, they are two parts of one whole: me! Second, both professions – medicine and flight – are beautiful, complementary pursuits that inform one another.     Track & field is like a safe haven for me. It’s always “been there for me” (cue the violins…) in a way that nothing else has. When I didn’t match into a surgical residency coming out of Harvard Medical School, my confusion, shame, frustration and let’s be frank, anger (I paid borrowed over $100,000 to end up with no job?!?!?! What?!?!?!) couldn’t be quantified. I was inconsolable.   The single place I could go where everything made sense again was the track. There, the universe is simple. Quiet. Calm. True. No bells and whistles. Just you, your sneaks, your intention and an oval of possibility. Effort, will, grit, allowing, focus, artistry and sincerity are the rule rather than the exception. There, misunderstanding and social politics don’t leak into the equation with their trademarks, confusion and nuance. There, it’s about breath, physical movement (what a pure expression of self), making something happen. Or not. It’s the place I went to, and go, where everything is always right. It’s the place I went to, and go, to right my ship when it seems to be toppling.       But medicine is also “there for me” (cue louder violins and throw in a swell of kettle drums…). When I’m unable to execute a physical feat well, when lack of adequate rest, over-zealous (read: dumb) training habits and poor mechanics conspire to produce an injury (subchondral bone fracture, patellar tendonitis, grade 1 ankle sprain to name a few), the track and the gym simply aren’t available to me. But my “other” profession is. Suddenly, through injury, the opportunity to forge even stronger connections with patients opens up.     During my fellowship in New York, a patient’s mother said she wanted to cry when I said “I know how frustrating this must be for your son, it’s a major part of his identity.” I get it. And I don’t take the privilege of patient-doctor connection for granted. What an honor it is to have studied something I love (musculoskeletal medicine!), talk about it with people I can relate to and help them get better. At “work.” What a coup! Not only have I been formally trained to diagnose and treat but I’ve been informally trained to know exactly what my patients are feeling when they say “I just want to run again;” exactly what they mean when they nervously ask “can I do more damage by exercising?” Thinking through the anatomy, the mechanics, the treatment options and synthesizing a plan is a true team effort between my patients and me and it’s a joy. A calling.   So if track and field (training, lifting, visualizing, sleeping, hydrating, stretching) is “home base,” a quiet and personal space of refuge, then medicine is my dugout, a shared space of idea exchange, strategizing, exploration and discovery.     This blog was my coach’s idea. As usual, it’s a brilliant one I’ve embraced with total trust. The fact is, I’ve learned and continue to learn so much on this journey that it seems wrong not to capture a few lessons, packaged in a few stories. My sister and I enjoy the expression God will keep teaching you a lesson until you learn it, and remind each other of it often. Well, I’ve been in God’s classroom now for a good, long while (I may qualify as a “super senior,” for the love of Pete) and the lessons just keep on coming, some for the first and others for the umpteenth time. Maybe in sharing a few, we’ll all move closer to (debt-free) graduation.               So please feel free… To read, share, learn, grow as I explore the life lessons and wisdom enmeshed in this journey we’ve nicknamed long flying — more art than science, more messy than neat, all truth, nothing false. This is the beautiful, powerful art of flight. *Note: “Art,” in this context, is synonymous for: magic, perils, freedom, wonders, joy, thrill, brow-beating life lessons, hazards, risks, rewards, release, triumphs, divinity, escape, purity, holiness, peace, presence and fulfillment. Among other things.           Share this:EmailFacebookLinkedInLike this:Like...

The New Golden Stool

By on Jan 4, 2015 in Adventures | 0 comments

Ingredients: 2 X 4’s Gold paint Power drill Power saw Power sander Goggles Twin sister Creative element (n=1) “2 X 4 Basics” bench-making kit (includes instructions and posts) Results: A DIY bench with Batik detail A fabulous addition to the dining room (my case) or any room An amazing afternoon with your twin sister (my case) or any family/friend willing to hold stuff down while you drill, sand or saw   Nota bene: The Golden Stool (Akan: Sika ‘dwa) is the royal and divine throne of the Akan people (Ashanti people). According to legend, Okomfo Anokye, High Priest and one of the two chief founders of the Asante Confederacy, caused the stool to descend from the sky and land on the lap of the first Asante king, Osei Tutu. Such seats were traditionally symbolic of a chieftain’s leadership, but the Golden Stool is believed to house the spirit of the Asante nation—living, dead and yet to be born. -Wikipedia   Share this:EmailFacebookLinkedInLike this:Like...